You're right it does feel like shit. And tomorrow is going to be worse, because everyone can talk to you- except me. And he'll bring you something like flowers, and I'l just stand back and watch it happen, and try not to let it bother me. I'll be out with my family, and I'll try not to think about it. All I'll get is that look, the one that says "I'm sorry, but I want you to smile." the same damn look I've been getting for a month now. I don't know.
Here's to a sense of hope, completely false hope, but still hope.